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11:28 p.m. / March 07, 2005 - - lifelines

a childhood spent in front of the television, nutured by the glow of video games, has adequetely prepared me for work in the food service industry. every day is the same as the one before it, you are constantly doing the same thing accomplishing nothing, and your only goal is to get a higher score than the one you currently have.

you should have seen how quickly i was out of there after my time expired. i work as hard as i can. i do a good job. then i leave. i just need the money. i was talking to somebody, and they said to me, "jobs are good. they keep you busy."

if i wanted to keep busy, i'd read. or i'd paint. or i'd hitch hike. i am in this for currency- big fat american dollars.

keeping busy is never a problem. there is always something to do, even if that something is nothing. sometimes i like to just lay on the couch and fixate my eyes on different objects while slowing my breathing.

seven new cuts from my six hours at work. i did miss this part of the job. i liked the scars that formed gentle colour changes on the surface of my skin. this is character.

at work, i think of things to say in my diary later, but in the helterskelter world of fast food, i do not find time to write these things down. also, anything in my pockets turns into a mushy goo, as my pants and shirt are constantly wet. the messier i am when i clock out, the better i have performed my duties, by my estimation.

my hands will look very aged after a few more days of working. frostbitten from the freezer, cut from the utinsels, burned from the grease. i will look at them for long tracks of time, re-acquainting myself with them. a friend, she told me that i had abnormal lines on my hands. three across is the norm, which i do possess. but there is also one on each hand that goes straight up, cutting through these three lines.

she says it means that i will have a short life. i acquiesce to this, but assert that while it may be short, it will be the best life anyone has ever had.

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