3:30 a.m. / March 06, 2005 - -
i'd like a seat in the DRUNK section
i went to perkins two hours ago, at one thirty this morning. and, as is to be expected, i had the pleasure of sitting near tables full of rowdy waitress-angering drunks.i also learned that any cheescake is too much cheescake. as soon as it hits my tongue i'm full and ready to sleep for about twelve hours.
drunk table #1, they were across the isle and one booth up from me (meaning, in front of me, within my field of vision). they garnered most of my attention. two twenty-something guys, a twenty-something girl, and then two forty something women. the young girl, she was incredibly wired and incredibly drunk; you can tell somebody is incredibly drunk when all they talk about is their not being drunk. also, she vomited into her water.
they noticed my laughing at some point and brought light to it. i acknowledged that yes, i was laughing at the drunk perkin's people. on the way out the young girl stopped me. "all right," my penis thought, "sex city" but it turned out that he was, as usual, wrong. she asked me my name, held out her hand, told me her name (elizabeth), asked me my name, held out her hand, and told me her name again. one of the young guys said, "one question. what are you doing at perkins alone at this time of morning?"
so i lied to them and said i was driving from new york to san francisco, and that i had stopped in forest lake for a few days to spend with my family, that i was just leaving town and decided to get something to eat first, prefer night driving. i am the fucking bomb when it comes to being a total liar. i can't wait until, three days from now, they come into kfc while i'm working the register.
